Chris Christie, Giving Too Much Info, Says He Wraps The Little Christie For Protection

Nothing to say about this except "Huh?"

The Christie camp has been using the hashtag #TellingItLikeItIs to promote the New Jersey governor’s campaign on Twitter. And that’s exactly what he was doing at a town hall meeting in Manchester, New Hampshire Tuesday morning when he explained to a diner full of voters, “I’m a Catholic, but I’ve used birth control, and not just the rhythm method.”

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Near the two-hour mark of the event, a man cited three Bible verses to raise arguments in support of environmental conservation and ending wars abroad. Christie launched into a discussion of how religion is separate from politics, and how Americans have the right to practice their faith as they choose.


“We should all acquit ourselves in a way that we believe is consistent with the teachings that we follow, if we follow certain teachings from a religious perspective,” Christie said. “That’s what I’ll always continue to try to do. Me for instance, I’m a Catholic, but I’ve used birth control, and not just the rhythm method, ok. So, you know, my church has a teaching against birth control. Does that make me an awful Catholic because I believed and practiced that function during part of my life? I don’t think so.”

There were a few laughs, but capturing the mood best was a man in front of Christie who put his palm to his forehead in dismay just after the candidate said “rhythm method.”

You know he's floundering when he's doing rhythm method/birth control jokes and supporters are slapping their foreheads with their palms.

Here's the video:
 



The comments at Politico are great - here's a sampling:

He hasn't seen Little Christie in years.

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Way too much information.......thanks......Wife on top for Safety.....

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Where is the brain bleach...

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"Ok baby, now rub this KFC extra crispy all over you..oh yeah, so hot.."

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The new feminine side of Governor Fatso? Next he'll be telling us he's had an abortion.

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Good, then make sure that women have control over their bodies and not the government and have access to legal, safe, birth control that includes abortion.

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Having your gut panis completely cover your genetalia is NOT a recognized form of birth control, but seeing you in baseball pants might be.

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Once you've seen that picture, it cannot be unseen. Word to the wise.

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I just googled it. My God.

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The Madam requires condoms to keep her girls safe.

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No, that's okay Politico. I didn't feel like eating today any ways.

From 61,000 booing him on Sunday to a collective America looking for the "brain bleach" to wipe away the image conjured up by his sharing his birth control use.

Heckuva week, Chris.

Bill Gates Screws With Condom

Good stuff:

The Gates foundation — quite justly — is trying to create a Next Generation condom. Currently, there are something like 750 million global users of condoms — although 830 million more insisted that they were when asked. But as the foundation points out, what other device has been around for hundreds of years with limited innovation in all that time? Perhaps an improved design could inspire more people worldwide to be responsible. It is offering $100,000, with the possibility of up to $1 million, to aid in the development of a product that skirts the current complaints of diminished sensation and confusing application.

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Given Gates’ track record in supporting Next Generation things, I am a little concerned. Remember Windows Vista? He thought that was enhancing the user experience. The last thing we need is to replicate that experience with prophylactics. If the “next generation” condoms are anything like Next Generation Windows, you will be stopped midway through by an error message informing you that you have performed an illegal operation and need to restart. “Would you like to send an error report?” it will ask. “No,” you will murmur, crawling off into a corner to die in shame.

“This is great!” Gates will say. “This is what millions of men and women worldwide were missing! People love it when you ask them if they want to send an error report. It shows you care.”


Or worse, Clippy will make an appearance. “It looks like you’re wrint a letter” a voice will intone, alarming the other participant. “Do you need help?” By the time you have gotten rid of Clippy, the mood will be ruined, and you will have composed several letters and accidentally closed several windows that you did not mean to.

“This offers you 3800% more sensation, including some sensations only previously accessible by walruses and Vulcans!” a Vista Condom will inform you. “But it may without any warning whatsoever stop working, giving you both herpes and twins. On the bright side the graphics are so vivid if your processor is up to speed.”

Older machines are bound to have difficulty with whatever they come up with.

You remember Windows XP. Sure, it’s fine now — but when it first came out, there were patches being issued with an alarming regularity. This is really not an option when it comes to prophylaxis. “Well, it won’t happen AGAIN!” Windows support will cheerily inform you, as you rear septuplets.

The last thing you need when you are trying to be safe is to get an error message telling your that a Required DLL file could not be found and that it could not delete explorer.exe because that file was already in use. What is a required DLL file? Why is Internet Explorer involved in this at all?

By the time the Condom XP has convinced you of its reliability and usability, they would be trying to foist the Condom Vista on you, or the Condom 8, which worked pretty well on your phone but in general made you sort of wish you’d gotten a Condom OS X Mountain Lion instead.

All in all, these are dangerous waters, and no matter what someone will come chasing after you insisting that the Linux Condom is the way to go. Still, it’s not a bad idea for innovation. As long as the foundation can keep the Blue Screen of Death out of it.

I just hope they put Bill's face on the tops of the condoms.

Nothing will prevent pregnancy (and erections) more than that.

DOE Tells Parents Of Wait-Listed Kindergartners To Send Their Kids To $16,000 Private School

With the NYCDOE, it's "children first...always":

Officials at a popular lower Manhattan public school have outraged dozens of parents whose kids are wait-listed for kindergarten by suggesting that they consider a $16,000-a-year private school down the block instead.

In an e-mail to prospective parents, PS 276 staffers gave parents scant hope of landing an open slot while touting the opening of “The Learning Experience Children’s Academy,” a new private school set to open next week.

The sales pitch hailed the private school’s class-size limits of 16 kids, and noted that it models its program on the Department of Education’s “core curriculum” for kindergarten.

Unmentioned in the e-mail from parent coordinator Erica Weldon — on which PS 276 principal Terri Ruyter is copied — is the private school’s price tag of $1,600 per month for 10 months, with summers off.

Well, I guess this solution is better than the last one the DOE came up with - birth control for parents to keep the kindergarten population down.

But something the NY Post fails to mention is just how "hot" this new Learning Experience Children's Academy chain is - and indeed, it is a "chain."

Here's a press release from the company crowing over their new Manhattan location:

NEW YORK, April 18, 2012 /PRNewswire via COMTEX/ -- The Learning Experience® (TLE®), the nation's top growing early learning academy for children 6 weeks to 5 years old, announced today it has opened its first Manhattan location. The newest TLE® Children's Academy, the 150th location nationwide, is located at 20 West Street, New York City, NY.

On the heels of a study released by the Education Department stating that nearly 5,000 children qualified for gifted and talented kindergarten seats in New York City public schools in the fall (22 percent more than last year), TLE's® Brooklyn location reported that 100 percent of its center's children that qualified for kindergarten passed the New York City Gifted and Talented test and 85 percent were already performing at the first grade level.

"In spite of, or possible directly related to our economic displacement, parents are stressing advancement through early education as a high priority for their children," says Richard Weissman, TLE® President. "Our nationally proven platform is best suited to instill preschoolers with the necessary tools for future academic and life successes."

The 9,600-square-foot state-of-the-art center in the landmark Art Deco building, formerly the Downtown Athletic Club in Battery Park City, Manhattan, will serve the growing demand of parents who wish for their children to be fully prepared for grade school, and beyond. The exceptional, high-quality curriculum - including yoga, early reading program Fun with Phonics®, sign language for infants, foreign languages such as Spanish, and manners and etiquette - has 90 percent of children enrolled at TLE® reading before the age of 4.

Averaging a center opening every 15 days, TLE® has a growth rate of 81 percent for the past 7 years. "We recognized the continuing demand for high-level preschool education in Manhattan and sought to bring our centers to key locations throughout the city for some time," said Mr. Weissman. "We bring more than 30 years of educational and business success to the market, which makes this a perfect fit for an established city."

Headquartered in Boca Raton, Fla., TLE® is thriving and continues to be a leader in the advanced preschool industry with a mix of company-owned and franchised locations. In addition to the Manhattan location, TLE® has a prominent presence throughout the Tri-State area with over 60 centers in New Jersey, 5 in Connecticut, and 13 in New York, including one in Brooklyn, and several more scheduled to open throughout the 5 boroughs including Staten Island.

Gee, it sounds wonderful. I mean, who wouldn't love a school that offers yoga for four year olds.

And yet, I seem to remember that the DOE letter to parents with wait-listed kids stated how the Learning Experience Children's Academy stresses a "core curriculum," you know, like the Common Core curriculum the NYCDOE uses to indoctrinate, er, educate children for 21st century feudalism, er, challenges.

Is yoga for four year olds part of that "core curriculum"?

Or do you have to pay $16,000 a year to get that?

Just wondering.

Oh, and you know what else I noticed about the Learning Experience Children's Academy?

It doesn't seem to be obsessed with standardized testing and test prep.

Indeed, they still have something call "playtime" on what they call Make Believe Boulevard, an indoor Main Street, USA playset that allows for socio-dramatic play.

Correct me if I'm wrong, but most NYCDOE kindergartens don't have this kind of thing anymore, do they?

I can't say for certain, but I just don't there's a "socio-dramatic play" component in the Common Core curriculum.

Not in between all that test prep and drills they're doing...