Perdido 03

Perdido 03

Saturday, August 29, 2015

Chris Christie Says He'll Track Immigrants Like Fed Ex Packages

Trying to out-Trump the one and only Donald Trump, Chris Christie today:

Laconia, New Hampshire (CNN)Chris Christie said Saturday that if elected president, he will track undocumented immigrants like FedEx packages.

"I'm going to have Fred Smith, the founder of FedEx, come work for the government for three months. Just come for three months to Immigration and Customs Enforcement and show these people," the New Jersey governor said at a town hall event here.

Christie added that while FedEx can track boxes, the U.S. can't track undocumented immigrants.
"You go online and at any moment, FedEx can tell you where that package is," he said. "Yet we let people come into this country with visas, and the minute they come in, we lose track of them."

Christie added, "We need to have a system that tracks you from the moment you come in and then when your time is up," he said. "However long your visa is, then we go get you and tap you on the shoulder and say, 'Excuse me, it's time to go.'"

Christie went on to say that all this talk about "anchor babies" makes the Republican Party look hostile to immigrants.

Oh, but saying you're going to track them like Fed Ex packages doesn't?

8 comments:

  1. He should keep track of his calories and remember his grandparents were immigrants.
    Trump's mother was an immigrant! I don't understand that type of mentality.

    ReplyDelete
  2. All four of my grandparents were immigrants as were my elder aunts and uncles. As an ESL teacher, I have taught thousands of immigrants; both legal and illegal. Immigrants today like immigrants in the past have arrived at our shores seeking to improve their lives. My governor is a disgrace to a state teeming with immigrants.

    Abigail Shure

    ReplyDelete
  3. Maybe we should microchip Christie to keep track of his whereabouts. Petco does it for 15 bucks.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Already got it covered. He's at 2% in Iowa polls, 5% in NH polls (a state he must win to stay in 2016 race) and 3.5% in national polls.

      In short, his whereabouts?

      The toilet...

      Delete
  4. Hey, once a BLABBERMOUTH, always a BLABBERMOUTH! Kinda like being a RABID ATTACK RUG!

    ReplyDelete
  5. If Chris Christie was an immigrant, the best way to track his whereabouts-would involve using the NASA satellite system.

    ReplyDelete
  6. A seismograph would work equally well, at a much lower cost.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I like your idea. The sound of his mouth alone causes much shaking.

      Delete